On Saturday after a nice lunch in Chapel Hill we made our way to the very brick (yet very beautiful) Kenan Flagler School of Business. Unlike Fuqua it felt small and intimate and we found a nice room to settle in for our 3 hour class on conflict resolution. I wasn't quite sure what to expect, but with an open mind and a commitment to making this project as successful as possible we navigated a new kind of terrain, the emotional.
Our teacher was Kevin, a friend of John's, another Kenan Flagler student and an incredibly calm and peaceful person. With his wife almost in labor, he took time out of his busy weekend to meet with us. For this we are grateful.
We talked about our natural responses to conflict in the past, in the present and what we'd like to be able to do in the future. It was time to think hard. Was I aggressive? passive? scared of conflict? Were my first reactions angry outbursts or a complete shut down? We charted our tendencies on the board and realized that whatever our natural instincts were, we all had the same goal- to handle conflict in a productive way.
Kevin shared an experience with us, where his team in Africa under extreme stress and pressure had a complete communication breakdown. As a result, tensions rose, misunderstandings multiplied, and the project was not as successful as it could it have been.
Among our project plans, reports, spreadsheets, and research we had overlooked one of the greatest threats to a successful project: the team dynamic. Not the once a week meeting with hugs and kisses to go around, but the dynamic on the ground, exhausted, and uncertain.
We discussed how to apologize, how to approach one another during a conflicted time, and ways that we could communicate effectively with one another without "stuffing emotions". Then we practiced. We looked eachother in the eye and apologized, maybe it was an apology to another person, but we gingerly walked through the steps amazed at the power of small words. We shared stories trying to bridge our histories, and learned more about one another.
The hours flew by, and exhausted and bleary eyed with information overload we dispersed feeling like we were about to change in a deep and meaningful way. I think we have just scratched the surface...
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment